A double free, lucky me

At present I am in an internet cafe (my new home, I think) just off Victoria Street. For some strange but beautiful reason the man let me in for free, even though I'd already made it obvious that I was going to pay.

Ok I just had a horrible thought: what if he stole my buspass this morning, recognised me from the photo and felt bad, therefore giving me free access? Jeez I can't think like this, I just can't.

Anyway, so...well yesterday's events were less than perfect regarding el familia shit. After school was fun and depressing at the same time. I went back out to virgin/h&m, saw LJ, Dane and Molly...we went to mcdonalds, where LJ found (and drank!) a free coke left on the table and I kneed this woman in the leg by accident. I spent forever in virgin megastores but to no avail. The dvd selection was shit, and all I wanted to do was spend money. I even tried Hmmm, but I had to force myself home.

Well...sunday was fun too. Molly couldnt come out :-( but me, LJ and Dane skatenboarded/scottered around, went to 'help out' at the parish centre of a nearby church. Afterwards we went around a bit, crashed tesoc's then went back to mine to watch 'The Ring'. A good day yet again.

Ooh I hope this works...Regina has been absent from my life for long enough.

As has Nate and his miserably beautiful happenings. I thought of a philosophy for him, from my own little daily passings...

Everyday I pass the same two spiderwebs. These spiderwebs are huge and vast with really big spiders in them, stuck right in the middle of their self-made webs. I have seen these webs after downpours of rain and gusts of wind and they're still intact and I've begun to really wonder: how long will it be, how much will it take, for the spiders to leave, to wind up their webs and move away from the problems constantly pounding them down. What will it take for them to give in? That's the overall question.

Nate is the spider. The web is his tangled, mangled life. But then there's another question: he can't be the centre of this web. He puts everyone he knows before himself and can think of anyone before he considers himself.

Is Bethie the spider? Is bethie at the centre of his web, his world, his thoughts? Is the negative imagery we get when we think of the spider just stereotypically expected? Or is there a reason for this metaphor? Is Bethie tangling up Nate's life?

And if she is, is she doing it on purpose?

Well that's about it for now. I may go on msn for a bit.